The Beat Of a Different Drummer

You Never Know Until You Try.

As I noted in my last post, I was looking forward to the new television season in large part because of the new Hawaii Five-O. I’m a rabid Alex O’Loughlin fan and was thrilled that he’d been picked to play “Steve McGarrett” in the new show. I loved his previous series, “Moonlight” and “3 Rivers,” but they were cancelled. “Moonlight,” in which Alex played a vampire, won a People’s Choice award for favorite new series, so I don’t know what happened, except maybe the writers’ strike that was going on at the time. I wish the powers that be had given it a little longer, because the very next year, the vampire craze hit; I’m sure “Moonlight” would still be on, riding the wave of vampire mania. Instead, Alex O’Loughlin is riding another wave, or at least heading a show set in Hawaii, where wave riding, aka surfing, is so popular.

What does all that have to do with the title of this post? I’m glad you asked. To be literal, I can talk about drums and drumming and point to the kettle drum in the amazing Hawaii Five-O theme song. More figuratively, though, is the notion of someone marching to a different drumbeat than others—having different “tastes.” “Moonlight” and “3 Rivers” aren’t the only shows I’ve liked that got cancelled; there have been many over the years. It seems that I’ve always fallen into minority status with my likes and dislikes. I’ve loved shows that weren’t the “in” shows and often hated shows that were all the rage. It has been the same with actors—I still fail to see the big deal about a male actor who’s been voted “Sexiest Man Alive.” To each her own, I guess.

Sometimes I get tired of being the salmon swimming upstream, because it can be exhausting. I’m too stubborn to cave in, though. I am who I am. Sometimes, it’s no big deal going against the “norm.” (I wonder, though, if it’s the “norm” or if the proponents of a certain position are just more vocal and visible than opponents—just a thought.) Now and then, my position on something puts me at odds with others, and I encounter verbal chiding, funny looks, or outright hostility.

The Bible declares people who follow God’s commandments to be “peculiar,” meaning “special” (I Peter 2:9; Deuteronomy 14:2, 26:18; Titus 2:14). If we love God and obey Him, we’re special to Him. It seems to me that in a world that supposedly values inclusivity, political correctness, “rights,” expressing and standing up for Christian beliefs makes you the exception to the “live and let live” philosophy bandied about. You get called “narrow-minded,” “bigoted,” or some other less-than-flattering label. You’re certainly not called “special.” It doesn’t help our case when misguided people take certain Scriptures out of context to support their hate-filled agendas. The Bible does state certain black-and-white edicts: don’t steal, etcetera, but even when Scripture clearly calls for punishment of sin, it doesn’t advocate hating the sinner. It’s quite the opposite, in fact, but it’s easy to forget that in the heat of the moment. Like I wrote in my post “Unhelpful Help,” it’s not helpful to criticize people, but it is helpful to lovingly point out another way to behave. As someone who often marches to a different drummer, I’ve been on the receiving end of both approaches. I hope it’s made me more sensitive to and respectful of my fellow marchers, no matter which drummer they’re marching to.

A New Season

You Never Know Until You Try.

Like many Americans, I looked forward to the new fall television season. I especially wanted to see the Hawaii Five-0 reboot. I still love the original; it was a good show and it brings back memories of my long-dead grandmother, who adored “Steve McGarrett.” As a fan of the
original and as a huge Alex O’Loughlin fan, I was practically panting with anticipation. I watched the premiere and loved it; I hope it enjoys a long, successful run.

Amid all the new season mania this week, mine included, I started to compare the attention we give to our favorite celebrities with the attention we give to God. Do we pant for Him as ardently as we do for them? David says in Psalm 42:1, “As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God.” That’s how it should be, but is it? Maybe our souls pant for Him, but our minds are elsewhere, like on who’s headed for rehab, who has a new movie out, or who’s supposedly sleeping with whom.

We certainly have plenty of stories about celebrities—look at the grocery store check-out area, and you’ll see tabloids galore; turn on the television, and you can watch “Extra,” “Entertainment Tonight,” and a number of other shows dedicated to keeping us informed on the comings and goings of entertainers. Celebrity watching has its place, but it seems that we too often neglect to give God the same interest. We devour the latest tabloid but neglect to read the Bible lying on the shelf. Determined to miss not one single minute of a broadcast, we faithfully DVR the latest episode of some crime drama, soap opera, or reality show, but we fail to attend worship services week after week. I think most of us are guilty of these actions at one time or another.

The good thing is that God is always there, just waiting for us to show an interest in Him. Lamentations 3:22-23 tells us that God’s compassions don’t fail and are new every morning. He makes all things new (Revelation 21:5). All we have to do is ask, and He forgives our sins, heals our wounds. That’s better than even a new television season.

Let Your Words Edify Others (Pt 3) . . . Or Unhelpful "Help"

You Never Know Until You Try.

Until recently, I hadn’t posted anything in ages, but as I noted in part 1 of “Let Your Words Edify Others,” I’ve had a good reason: I’ve been looking for a job since I graduated in December, 2009 and dealing with all the emotional ramifications that entails. I’ve been blessed with lots of people who care about me and with lots of networking opportunities, so I’ve gotten some advice along the way as I’ve navigated the waters post-graduation. Like advice of all kinds and about all subjects, some has been helpful, and some hasn’t. Some has come from well-meaning people who have no clue what being unemployed in this job market is like. Or no clue about anything other than that they’ve heard I’m looking for a job.

Some people have the mindset that “need a job” means any job, anywhere, doing anything, for any pay, even if it means depleting resources one might already have. I don’t happen to fall into that category. Drive 50 miles each way in a nearly 20-year-old gas-guzzler for $8 an hour? I don’t think so! Not when I’m a single adult with no one else to support me and no way to replace said gas-guzzler if it dies! I know no job is perfect—nothing in this fallen world is, but I firmly think a person, if he or she can afford it and after careful prayer feels God's "permission", should pass on taking just any old job if she (or he) knows it:

1. Won’t build her resume in the right direction, but sends it in the wrong direction, pigeon-holing her into the “wrong” line of work. Especially true of recent “adult” college grads like me. I think if someone had been in a fulfilling, adequately lucrative job in the first place, she wouldn’t have gone back to school. (Unless of course her industry, like textiles or tobacco, to use a North Carolina example, is a dying one or jobs are getting sent overseas. There are always exceptions.)

2. Won’t pay her bills or may even deplete her resources. (See paragraph 2).

3. Is doing something she hates so much that the mere thought of doing it saps all strength and/or hope from her mind, body, or spirit, making looking for something better a near-impossibility and avoiding being fired from the hated job a struggle of superhuman proportions.

4. Is doing something she knows she’s incapable of doing physically, even with “reasonable accommodations.” (Similar to #3).

5. Involves a schedule that won’t leave time to look or interview for a better-fitting job.

My lessons during this episode, reminders of things previously learned, have been several:

1. Keep praying and expecting the best outcome, despite how things look.

2. Keep looking—don’t give up!

3. Though I’ve had to remind myself that though some “helpers’” heads seem to be somewhere out in space—Mars, Pluto, etcetera, their hearts are in the right place. If someone offers advice, it means she cares about me enough to try to help in some way. Give her an “A” for effort.

4. I can explain what I’m looking for and my qualifications so people have enough information to make informed judgments about whether to pass a job prospect on to me.

5. If you are a square peg and try to fit yourself into a round hole, it won’t be a good fit. You can do it for a short while, but your edges, and the round hole’s, will get dinged.

6. As I note above, someone offers advice because she cares enough about me to try to help, but it’s not her responsibility to help me find a job (or a house, car, husband, dog, new dress, birthday present for Mom—you get the picture). We just owe each other Christian love.

7. Because I want my words to edify, or encourage, others, I need to think and pray before I offer someone advice or “help.” Otherwise, I may be most UNhelpful.

Let Your Words Edify Others (Pt 2) . . . Or Unhelpful "Help"

You Never Know Until You Try.

I noted in my last post that a TV celebrity profile show was instrumental in breaking the writer’s block I’ve had the last few months. The show was, of all things, about a (recently-retired?) porn star with the initials J. J. It was the typical profile, covering her childhood, how she got into “the biz,” career highlights, and interviews with her; her friends, family and co-workers; and anti-porn activists. As a Feminist and a Christian who abhors porn’s influence, a lesson I got from that show is that God can use anything to get a message through to us.

One anti-porn interviewee was a “minister” who asserted that J. J. is hell-bound because she’s used her body committing fornication for money. J. J.’s husband noted that in addition to her many fan letters, J. J. has received hate mail from professing Christians asserting that she is going to burn in hell, and they’re glad of that fact. J. J. and her friends rebutted that she’s going to heaven because she’s a “good person.”

So what other lesson did I get from that show? You guessed it; it’s about whether words we speak edify, or encourage and lift others. Is the “help” we offer others helpful, or is it harmful? The way I see it, the words of the minister, and if J. J.’s husband gave an accurate account, the words of the professing Christians, were condemning instead of edifying, unhelpful instead of helpful.

Condemning someone is certainly not helpful. In the case of J. J., it just had the predictable result of J. and her friends dismissing the accusations as the rantings of narrow-minded extremists and led to justification as to how the accusers were wrong themselves. What would have been helpful, whether it produced immediate acceptance or not, would've been the gentle, loving presentation of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

As I understand Scripture, we’re not hell-bound because we commit one particular sin such as fornication, but we’re all sinners. (Romans 3:23—All have sinned and come short of the glory of God). The antidote for our sin is Jesus Christ’s death on the cross. (John 3:16—For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.). The only way to go to heaven is to accept that antidote, because being “good enough” isn’t good enough. (Isaiah 64:6— . . . all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags.). Furthermore, we shouldn’t rejoice in someone’s misfortune. (1 Corinthians 13 tells all about love.) I think going to hell, being eternally separated from God, is the worst misfortune imaginable. Having someone condemn us outright, case closed, no real explanation, is also a misfortune.

Another lesson from that broadcast was that I need to pray before I even think about approaching someone caught in sin and remember that condemning him or her will only drive a wedge between us and make it harder for him or her to listen to and really hear the gospel message. I pray that J. J., her friends and (former) co-workers—everyone in need of the gospel message, will hear this wonderful, life-changing message of love presented in love and will accept it with thanksgiving.

Let Your Words Edify Others (Pt 1)

You Never Know Until You Try.

Praise God, I’m back! I haven’t posted because I’ve been fighting a battle with unemployment and its fallout. That’s bad enough, but there have been a few non-employment crises the last few months that have left me reeling. If I’d written before now, I may have subjected readers to more of what we’re all hearing from every corner, given the economy: anxiety, frustration, etcetera.

I’ve written stories and poetry since I learned how to write in school, and I’ve kept a journal since I was 13. I took half a dozen fiction and memoir writing classes in college, and I’ve had numerous people tell me that my writing has touched them. My heart’s desire is to use this ability God’s blessed me with to encourage and inspire others, so you can understand why I’ve been freaked out that I’ve felt unable to do more than rant. My journal entries haven’t been pretty, and since I want to encourage others, I didn’t want to write “doom and gloom” blog entries.

Then again, maybe it would’ve helped someone to read that I’ve been feeling freaked out—maybe some other middle-aged man or woman has felt adrift in a gale in a row boat and would’ve felt better reading me whine a little about my situation. As my friend “K” says, “Would you like a little cheese with that whine?” I don’t think it would’ve been helpful to anyone other than me, though; common sense has told me that I haven’t been the only one feeling like I’d have to jump like "The Shaq" to reach bottom. During this time, I’ve tried to read, listen to, and watch uplifting things, not things that illustrate how far down the tubes so many people are. I’m overjoyed when I learn some common working person has won the lottery or something. I think to myself, at least someone is getting somewhere. I don’t want to hear of someone’s misfortune—it brings me down. I know; we can respond by thinking how blessed we are compared to someone else, but it’s also way too easy to think, what if that happens to me, too? The way I see it, I’m better off minimizing my exposure to anything Satan might use against me.

During these months, my prayers have sometimes been like “Psalms, Part Two” as I, like David, have asked (am still asking), “How long, Lord?” I’ve felt about as impotent as an 80-year-old man before the invention of the “Little Blue Pill.” I’ve begged God to show me what I did that I shouldn’t have done; what I didn’t do that I should’ve done; what I said that I shouldn’t have said; what I didn’t say that I should’ve said. One friend asserted the other day that I haven’t done anything wrong; maybe, like Job, my particular situation is just one of those times of testing. Maybe that’s what’s going on with lots of people during this economic crisis. I’m glad my friends have encouraged me and stood in prayer for me when I couldn’t stand myself. (Yes, I mean that both ways it can be taken.)

Then, completely out of left field, 2 nights ago, I caught a celebrity profile show that struck a nerve. I watched some of it, and my response was a natural one—I immediately picked up paper and pen and wrote the first draft of what will be a series of blogs. No sweating blood; no “what am I going to write” feeling. It just flowed. I spent yesterday talking with those dear ones who have stood for, and with, me during this whole thing and related, tears of gratitude and relief running down my face, how something had finally “given.”

Nothing has changed financially, but I’ve got a measure of peace that I’ve literally begged God for. What took so long? One friend suggested it may be like the story in chapter 10 of The Book of Daniel where Michael came in as reinforcement in the war with the prince of the kingdom of Persia. In 1st Thessalonians Satan hindered Paul from visiting Thessalonica. The Bible is full of examples, besides the obvious one of the Israelites' 40 years in the wilderness, of breakthroughs that took a long time. Whatever the hindrance, I’m immensely glad it has been broken. I’m curious how many angels have been involved in this latest spiritual skirmish. I still wish my situation would change for the better, but I’ve got a feeling of peace, which I haven’t had in a long time. Thank You, Jesus!